Sometimes at the end of the day I ask myself, “How is it that I didn’t burst into tears today? If he really cared about the dog he would have contacted me right after it happened.” I’m listening to the new song by Lady Antebellum called “I need you.” Most people who listen to this probably interpret it as a love song — which is probably the right determination! I’m pretty sure it’s just another way to control me by making me upset (which is STILL working, damnit).This will be the sixth Christmas without my mother and the FIRST one without any of my family around. She came to term today actually but her and her doctors think she’ll be at least a week late.
I was crashing at my friends’ house for a few months and just moved into my own apartment. I miss my bestie so much, and it was so wonderful and comforting to see her this weekend too.
Living solo is great — no rules but your own and no one to blame for mistakes but yourself; I plan to do a lot of soul-searching 🙂 It’s also the first time I’ve had to buy furniture, pay my very own bills — and spend my first Christmas alone.
Give yourself two hours to walk, talk and enjoy each other’s company before settling down to a picnic in the middle of nowhere.
There’s a new craze of the moment – private karaoke booths.
And I don’t really believe in that “love at first sight” thing, or knowing the person is who you are going to marry after the first date. I desperately need to start my running regime again. Writing used to be a way that I let go of things; now it almost hurts to much to face those things, and I’ve learned in many ways to stop myself from feeling and in simple terms “talk my way out” of it alltogether. But it still makes me angry when I see him doing the things I would have wanted to do, the things that THIS girl does, things that make her happy and who she is.